One of the important characteristics differentiating addicted people from normal people is the aspect of dependence. Someone who depends on sex to survive is dependent. In other words, a sex addict feels that he cannot live without sex.
Normal people may want love and sex in their lives to greater or lesser degrees, but they also know that they can live without it for a while.
Sex addiction involves a dependency that is both physical and psychological. The physiological dependency is similar to the physical dependency of cocaine addicts; in other words, the addict "needs" the drug, activity, or person in order to feel "normal" and function, and the fix postpones withdrawal symptoms like depression or difficulty sleeping.
Sex addicts have rearranged their bodies' normal patterns of stimulation and relaxation to the point where only a sexual or romantic encounter will prevent the feeling of discomfort that signals the beginning of withdrawal and loss of functioning.
In terms of physical dependence, many sex addicts have programmed their bodies to the point where they cannot fall asleep without an orgasm.
Sex addicts can experience agitation and anxiety that may increase to the point of a panic attack if they sense that they will be unable to get their sexual fix.
Psychological dependence involves being "unable to live" without thoughts of sex or the love object; without patterns of friendships, leisure activities, and sex toys; without the excitement and so-called freedom of the addictive lifestyle; without the glamour and stimulation; and without the lying and secrecy.
The love and sex addict's psychological dependence is quite strong; in addition to the physical withdrawal symptoms he may have, there will be profound and powerful psychological withdrawal symptoms as well.
Breaking the psychological dependency is, then, an essential part of the recovery process.
See also: